Yesterday, New Jersey exploded. Apparently, everyone in that densely packed state of gardens was taking tax payer money and building structures made out of cheez whiz and pepsi max recycled cans. It was a field day for those people who take time out of their lives to make elaborate arguments (on youcrazytube) for an ever increasing conspiracy that explains just about everything that has happened in say, the past 100 years. You know what i’m talkin bout, willises. 911, elders of zion, fluoride, megan fox’s thumbs, playing thriller backwards, barack obama was born on the planet kodos. But my favorite favorite favorite one of this week, my favorite conspiracy theory, (that i heard someone who i once kinda respected repeat and now that respect has evaporated faster than my sweat on a 0% humidity day) is…

the apollo moon landing. If you can make an entire mythbusters episode dedicated to debunking this cottage industry, you know, as a conspiracy,  you have gone too far. If you haven’t seen the episode yet, i suggest you try to catch it; it’s on itunes. And here is a summary of the debunks. For fellow arguers,  it is probably the way you want to construct your side of any argument everytime. It goes like this. Here is the silly statement: in 1969 (when the most advanced movie was 2001) the moon landing happened on a hollywood soundstage. I kinda get why someone would be so blown away by the awesomeness of landing on the moon. We live in an america where we dont get things done. The idea that in ten years, through effort, (sprinkled with a little segregation, social unrest, commie hate and lots of money) we did the impossible, something that only bugs bunny has enjoyed, we reached the moon in a tin can, is pretty overwhelming.

When i watch when we left earth, i tear up. Everytime. Don’t get me started on astronauts. I dont throw this word out often, but…heros.

But the funny thing about occam’s razor is that it is actually  true.  The simplest explanation is most likely the right one. Take a look at this round of bunks on the conspiracy here on elegant universe. It’s a top five! Someone went out and picked their five FAVORITE ways to say, this conspiracy is crap.  How is something so easily debunked, still so pervasive? You know what really gets me?  The amount of assumptions piled into the moon landing conspiracy describes a world where humans are lying sacks of unlimited shit. Just think about the amount of people that would need to be lying for decades! I don’t have a mistrust in humans on that level. It’s just too exhausting. I like people. People rule.

The people that believe this are also dissing science. The scientific method has created the modern world and yet, it’s impossible for it to have led to nine trips to the moon?NINE. yes, science rules too.

Now i dont condone this. i abhor violence. It is not the science life way. The science life way is fighting with your mind, or thumbs, in the form of tiger woods golf (9 holes solves just about every major problem especially if you play on a crazy course like central park). But, if some crazy conspiracy theorist traveler, goes to seek me out, while i am a retired national hero, and comes up to my face, and calls me a lying coward? i might get skip gates on you. i get buzz aldrin.

i think buzz used some restraint in his famous 2002 mike tyson’s punchout moment. (yeah you revisionists, mike tyson was affiliated with something other than the hangover, once, long, long ago). However, that reaction most definitely did not help bring down the house of cards that is that conspiracy theory.

should you strike someone that is obviously mentally diminished?  Is that nor the new atheist way? Strike down the dummies with great vengeance and furious anger? As entertaining as PZ Meyers can be in his one man crusade to use the koran and christian bible as toilet paper, the prescriptions of unscientific america might just apply here. We are losing this war in America against the conspiracy theorists. We are up against million viewed youtube diatribes. We need to be constantly vigilant against the ignorance. But there is way to calmly refute ignorant statements. Mythbusters pulled it off PERFECTLY. Jon Stewart pulls it off almost every night. He’s a ninja with giggle stars.

If you want to see it in action, watch this clip of the daily show shooting down the already shot down and DEAD obama birther conspiracy theory. Listen to his scenario at the end, and realize that is the intricate mental gymnastics one plays when they embrace one of these ideas.

Notice how in this clip  evidence is presented that is factual and in plain sight. See the simplicity of occam’s razor. I know, that seems exhausting to pull off as well, but it’s ultimately fruitful. Towering ignorance demands such efforts.